Dear Lisa
What I mean by separating mentaly, is stop reacting to his actions, start slowly and ever so small. Just focuse on your own thought's and needs,However small they are.
Take out a picture of yourself when you were a little girl. Look at that girl, remember ,who was she, what made her smile, was she funny? what did she like to do? Did she have friends? discover her again..Take care of that little girl. Your still her... Now take a good long look in the mirror... study yourself.....what makes you smile.....what is good about you....what's special about you.? Have you loved yourself? Have you treated yourself well, Discover yourself again....figure out what your needs are....at this moment... it can be as simple as... I need 10 minutes to myself....light a candle... have a bath....
go to the library...read a spirtual book... be with you.....No one can take care of you, but you, because only you know what you need.
And you are amazing.............
either you'll thinK Iam the weirdest person on earth for writing this... but that is truly what helped me...It helps to GET YOU grounded, and solid, when you really know who you are.
No one can take the journey for you...unfortunatly...and there is no easy fix.. it's a slow process, but it is a healing process, and your already on your way.
Go girl........find that strength within.. and kick ass.....you are amazing.......You know you are.....!
regards Sally
( check out my posting called SOMETHING TO SHARE. it's posted on this alanon board....