I have never been to an AA meeting.
A few years ago, I was telling someone about my drinking and how it was getting out of control. He also wasn't a believer, but he suggested AA. I was pretty adamant. He said check it out anyway.
The next chance I got I went online to the AA site to see what was what. The page opened to the 12 steps...and my heart dropped. I knew then as I know now there was no way possible I could twist those tenets around to fit me. I knew if I went it would make my situation worse.
Katie, there are other things you can do if you feel that AA would be a trigger. You could try one-on-one talk with a counselor (I need to do that when I get the money). You can find people to hang around with who do NOT use drugs/alcohol. Surround yourself with positive people.
Ah, I just read that you're going to a SMART meeting.
See, there you go!