Lonley and Afraid
Tonight is my 1st night visiting this website. I think it is going to be good for me. I am 22, and I live with my boyfriend, who is 35 and he is a "binge" alcoholic. This past two weekends I have experienced my life getting a lot more dangerous. I went to a wedding. We had a wonderful day and then bam! He had way too much to drink and on the way home he was calling people on his cell phone and I made the comment that he was being a little obnoxious. Well that was all it took. He threatend to jump out of the car while I was drivng. (speed limit was 50mph)I told him no it was late and I just wanted to get home. Now because I wouldn't stop, he pulled the emergency brake while I was driving that speed. My car swwirved into the other lane with on coming traffic, then back into my lane then into the ditch. This was only the beginning. This past weekend, he attended a softball tournament and he drank from about 8am till 830 pm when I saw him again. I was upset to think how drunk he was and made metion that I was "upset". Not in a pissed off mood at all and he lost his lid! We came home and I packed a overnight bag to get away. He didn't want me to leave and so he grabbed me and threw me into our bedroom closet. Then he ran into the kitchen and grabbed the butcher knife out of the draw and was threatning to kill himself in front of me. I called a family member at that point cause I wasn't sure of what was going to happen. He then took off, walking down to the lake onto his boat. He told me that he was going to kill himself out on the lake. These are just some of the events I have had to deal with in the past couple of weeks. I am an emotional wreck, and my body is a little sore today. I love him with all my heart, and I can't seem to understand how to get through this. I have plans to go to an Al-anon meeting in my area and I hope that that will help me out. If there is anybody who has been through this or is going through this please let me know. I want to know that I am not the only person who is dealing with this. Someone to talk to would be a great help.
[This message has been edited by Linda332 (edited August 20, 2001).]