Hope for Today – January 22
Seeking progress rather than perfection and minding my own business are the two AL-Anon recovery suggestions that mean the most to me. I grew up with problem drinking. I carried the noting into adulthood that I must be perfect and that I was responsible for everyone. Of course I never achieved this goal of perfection, which left me feeling less than, not smart enough, not attractive enough, simply not good enough. To cope with my failure to achieve my goal of perfection, I focused on the character defects of those around me. My need to be perfect fed into my preoccupation with others.
In Al-Anon I found that I didn’t have to be perfect; I couldn’t be, not matter how hard I tried. Instead, I learned to be happy with forward motion, no matter how small. I practiced minding my own business and shifting my focus from others to myself so that I could change what I was capable of changing. I discovered that I wasn’t alone with the insanity of striving to be something I would never become. I learned how to identify and let go of unreasonable expectations and that other people, especially fellow Al-Anon members, did not have those same expectations of me. I am still learning to treat myself with gentleness, kindness, and love. I’m still learning that I cannot change those around me, but I can change how I treat them – with dignity and respect.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Today relaxing with my imperfection and enjoying my own business are enough for me. For this I am grateful.
“I have learned in meetings that tiny steps are perfectly acceptable and that they add up.” How Al-Anon works for Friends and Families of Alcoholics p. 323
