((Gwen))
My heart breaks when I read your post - I can feel your emotional pain as I read it.
I have no suggestions for you, but please know that I am praying for you and asking your HP to pour out His blessing on you and give you direction and comfort as you seek what is best for you in this situation so that you may enjoy your Sober life.
I know that you have been thru some really difficult time and You deserve to be able to enjoy the life you have worked hard to obtain.
HUGS my friend,
Rita