I am new here, so hi. I have been planning on going to alanon since the summer....but then you have the whole roller coaster thing and things were better...so I put it off. Then the holidays come and it rears it's ugly head. So my BF and I had a big fight and I told him I am going to alanon....it kind of just slipped out....previously I was going to do it and not tell him...because I wanted it to be for and about ME....But now that the cat's out of the bag...I am going to go and I don't have to lie about where I am going. So I am kind of in the same boat as you...not sure how to handle it. If he says he doesn't have a problem and you do...I would just calmly say "yes...so I am doing something about it." Good luck and keep me posted.