Old 11-25-2008, 05:46 AM
  # 21 (permalink)  
outonalimb
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Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Seeking Peace
Posts: 1,371
I hate myself at times for believing his ******** AGAIN. I cried a river because I am humiliated not because I'm heart broken.
Aaaww Blizzard...
I feel your pain.
Like everyone here, I've fallen into the same trap...trying again when I shouldn't have...and then beating myself up mercilessly for being so 'stupid', so naive, so gullible.
The most important thing you can do is work on forgiving yourself. You did what you did out of love. There is no shame in that. None whatsoever. Addiction is just so horrible...and sometimes, as non-addicts, I think we forget how powerful it's grip can be on someone we love. As angry as you are, try to remember that your AH didn't do this to you...his addiction is in charge. He's sick. Say a prayer for him and turn him over to your HP. And try to be gentle with yourself. With each 'slip', we learn a valuable lesson. You will heal and you will get past this...its just going to take time.
Understanding hugs to you...
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