Hi Stubborn I'm glad you are feeling upbeat about how things are going today. I would encourage you to focus on setting boundaries for the kind of behavior you are going to be willing to accept in your life once he gets out of the hospital, and what you will do for yourself and your children if the boundaries are violated. I know it will be hard because he will use the "sick and injured" card but boundaries can protect you and your children.
It's good not to have expectations about the outcome of a situation, but it is good to have expectations for how YOU are going to react in a specific situation. It is definitely ok to have expectations for how you will be treated by people and how you will respond if people dont treat you the way you expect. Personal boundaries are a KEY ingredient in your recovery from his problems.
For example:
I expect people to treat me with respect in my house. Therefore, if someone is disrespectful to me, I will ask them to leave my house immediately. If they don't do as I ask, that person can expect me to respond by .....