I agree with you liesagain, nearly everyone in my family is an alcoholic, I really believe it has alot to do with things that we really have no control over. I don't have an addictive behavior, unless you count shoe shopping an addiction! I have tried coke (20+ years ago) before my children were born and have never felt the urge to do it again. I also think my boyfriends issues are the addictive personality and his inner pain from several things, all of which I have no real idea what they all are. I do know he had unresolved issues with his mother when she passed away 20+ years ago, and that is a huge source of pain for him. My hurt and pain is horrible, but realizing that I can not cure him and I can't change him is killing me, I always want to fix things. I don't want to walk away, but feel that maybe my only option at this time.
I appreciate all of your comments, they are extremely helpful and encouraging.
Thank you all!
KM