The real question is what do we do with this situation.....of course I'm going to try and get into the solution here! There are a lot of things that help......... f2f meetings settle our nervous systems and calm us, meditation, connecting with others that allow us to see ourselves in other perspectives, movement (dance, yoga, pilates), counselling, massage, body therapy, a session with a SE practioner (somatic experiencing). SE is actually a "trauma recovery" method. Our autonomic nervous systems (fight/flight) can get caught in a "freeze" and that sets up the repetitive nature of our expereinces.
Donna.... those solutions.... are amazing!!! Sign me up!
I'm interested in learning more about somatic experiencing.... so if you have any more info on it - please send it my way! How neat that you are working in this area... the universe is good!
Anvil....... I totally get that! The boys dad was SO boring... and if he showed change or excitement - it just annoyed me. Now to his present fiancee ... I'm sure that he is just perfect for her! I'm happy for him that he has someone that adores him so much - he really is deserving!
So... I think even in serenity - there is the chaos that surrounds us - really it's just who/what we will give our power to. But to get to the point where I choose some spicy food or a good drumming session instead..... that will be some progress baby!!!!
As for Hank..... I bet he still lights your fire ...... but with your recovery - you are looking towards yourself more! I wouldn't be surprised if it's like you are just over being a slave or victim to anything that is not in your control...... be it drugs or another human being. What I think is super cool is that the two of you are on your own paths- and just by chance.... you both are heading the same direction. Sure there are bumps and windy turns at times....... but you aren't going to give power to *his* turbulence. At least that is what I see in my mind ...... which I think is a really good place to be!