Originally Posted by
drainedwife 
... i need to keep badgering him to get help..
Sorry but that is exactly what you do NOT need to do. What you need to do is:
Originally Posted by
drainedwife ... get out of denial and into reality that his is just not going to get better and that i do not want to live this way anymore....
Nothing is ever going to change for you until you start changing yourself and stop spending all your time and energy trying to change him.
I don't mean to be unkind, but I have been where you are and I did the same things you are doing. It simply will never work.
I'm sorry you are still in this mess. I learned the hard way that the only one who could get me out of my mess was me and to depend on a drug addict to do anything at all is simply useless.