I think for me it is more than just being scared to some degree...I had a full time job for almost two years that i just quit in June because I thought, (stupid me) things were ok with my ah.
With that job though, I feel that it was a very easy job, but I was full of stress because I had to work full time as well as take care of the kids and the household. Also, it is hard to get a job because of the economy right now, and I feel that I may be somewhat employable but I only have basic skills.....I cant qualify for much more than receptionist-or maybe admin assist. My goal is not to be self-suffificient because i think that would be an almost impossible feat for me...I cant make that kind of money and I dont have the capacity to go back to school and work at the same time.
Anyhow, I do appreciate the tips. I will google better budgeting and see what i can learn.
I guess alot of my fears lie with my childhood. I saw my mom stuggle to make ends meet when my dad left without paying a dime. I lived through being embarassed of where I lived and having less than all of my friends. I lived with having to go to high school half a day and working half a day because we needed the money. I didnt have anyone to guide me and help me improve my SAT scores so that maybe i could have gone to a better college. I didnt know about student loans, so i just went to where i could afford to go and pay my own way with some help with financial aid. I never wanted that for my kids...I want them to have a better life and childhood than i had..i feel like I am reliving it...I feel that I cant give my kids what they deserve...I dont want them to worry about money...I dont want them to be embarassed about where they live..I dont want them feeling sorry for themselves and not having opportunities that their friends will have.
But I guess that is life...I cannot control it...it is what it is...but it is just hard to take.