Oh yes, I remember my first Alanon meeting and Naranon meeting.
Tears, tears, tears. Luckily I kept going back. Because I was very close to having a breakdown. In fact, in the beginning I went to 3 or 4 meetings a week.
The program has helped me a great deal, it's a safe place to be, a place where you are not judged, and you are really understood.
I hope you will try different meetings and keep going back.