I'm sorry you are having a bad day. You are normal. You don't just give your heart to someone and then just say "poof - that's all over". I agree with Peace. Is it possible to do something different to enlarge your circle of friends? Making new connections gives you a chance to start over...a chance to remake yourself. I understand what you are feeling, but I have to believe that things will get better for us eventually.
You can't say what your XABF is doing now is "better". It's so easy to think that life is going grand when you are on the outside looking in. I wouldn't trade the chaos I had with my STBXAH for the peace that I have now. Sure it's difficult at times, but I remember what my days used to be like. I KNOW what life was like with him. Just because it looks all sweet right now, doesn't mean that is reality.
(((HUGS))) Hang in there.