My husband has lived in his house for 25 years (me only 6) and our neighbors know what is going on too. You would be suprised that it has actually been a blessing that they know. They are actually supportive and even can help at times. There have been times when I have called them to let me know if my AH's car was there when I was at work and he told me that he was too. (lie) They also ask on occasion if he is feeling well b/c they have seen him acting strange or just not talkative. (AH can talk to anyone) I know not every neighbor is nice or supportive but everyone has secrets that they keep behind closed doors. If yours are have any kind of heart or decency they will not change and will even treat you and your children with more respect. As you did not do this to your family, your husband did.