From an ACOA, making sure your focus is always on your child is a good place to start. My mother never bad-mouthed my father in front of us and never put us in a position of making us decide between her and him. My mother also never flinched when she found out unsettling information from us or anyone else about my father and his escapades. We speak candidly about this today. Her thinking was that we should never have to face adult situations (like being in the middle of their feuds over child support or visitation) because we were still children and she wanted us to enjoy being just that like she did when she was growing up.