Originally Posted by
sailorjohn 
Thanks, guys. The van has my name on the title, first name on the title, the license renewal tags were mailed to my address on her birthday, I put the envelope in her mailbox so she wouldn't be driving around with expired tags, how this whole sordid mess got started again, among other things. I was reasonably certain she might only get one other card for her birthday aside from maybe her kids so I left a card in her mailbox, my bad, feeling a little too much compassion.
As an outsider looking in, I don't see compassion at all. I see addiction. You are addicted to her plain and simple. I recognize it because I have experienced it myself. I have also told myself lies about it being compassion, in the other person's best interest, not wanting to hurt them, etc, etc, etc. I never really made much progress at all in recovery until I was willing to be completely honest with myself. And, yes I know, it's a really, really hard thing to do.
I also perceive a little bit of self-righteousness going on. And once again, you guessed it, I recognize it because I lived it.
Wanting to sneak the keys and take the van so that she will come back and find it gone sounds like a bit of a power play. Maybe to punish her for whatever you feel she has done to hurt you?
Whenever I am contemplating doing something, I try to honestly look at my motivation. Not just in the action itself, but the modus operandi, if you get my drift. Isn't there a more honest and straightforward way to protect your financial interest here?
Just trying to give you some food for thought. No need to answer in public.
L