jackjack

I don't have an appointment with my therapist until next week and some questions are nagging me so thought I would pose them here and see what you all thought...

My AH is in recovery (DOC: crack - clean for 3.5 months) so we are both working on ourselves and working programs, etc...

Yesterday he got himself into a bind when he wanted to go to this men's group (for addicts in recovery) yet he needed to pick up his son as it was our night to have his kids. He did try to get him a ride to our house but nothing worked out so he was faced with having to ask me to do it or his ex-wife. He knew that I would not be happy with having to do it since our two kids have been sick at home for the past few days and I have generally made it known that I will no longer pick up his pieces when he over-commits himself.

So my question is... He was pissed when I told him that I wasn't happy about having to do it. I also did feel it was important that he attend the men's group but when he said something like 'How do you think it feels that I can even ask my wife to help me'... I felt like I was being manipulated. So where is the line between helping someone without enabling?

Thanks