I know how mad this makes you and how hurt. It is so hard when it's your child. But, I have learned that I truly can't do anything but love my AD. The rest is entirely up to her. She also relapsed after being back home. I finally learned, no more! There is a book called "Hit by a Ton of bricks" that is good, I thought of it when I read your post.
Prayers from another mom,
susan