Chino

My AD has put the necessary distance between herself and a couple of friends but had to see them yesterday for a court date. She didn't say much about them, just that they're deep into addiction now.

Today we're driving home after her appt w/her therapist and stopped at a restaurant. All of a sudden in the parking lot she starts bawling her eyes out and tells me how it's killing her, seeing her friends destroy themselves. She said it's like they're soulless. She also said she understands what I felt like watching her all that time. She apologized for everything. Every last little detail. All I could do was hold her, tell her to breathe. Just breathe.

I didn't bother to tell her no, it was worse because you're my child; I let it go. She'll figure that one out on her own.

She also asked me if she's at fault for her friends becoming addicted to D's. I told her she's responsible for introducing it to them, but she isn't responsible for their addiction and she knows better since she's responsible for her own.

I asked her if she wanted forgiveness and she cried yes. I asked her if she believed in a HP and she said yes. So I told her to ask her HP for forgiveness, and then start to forgive herself.

I know and she knows that she needs to make amends to others and for herself, but I realized I don't need them. I need her and I'm glad she's alive.