What a disaster that meeting was....i am so sorry that you had such a negative experience. I can picture myself at 26 in similar circumstances...Go for counseling and accept that these people are professionals and are there to help you. Do not feel odd about being picky about changing to someone that you feel comfortable with....they totally understand. Be honest with them and yourself. Find the right person for YOU. Counseling has been a godsend...I convinced myself that I had to see a woman but I ended up with a man. He is almost more insistent on sobriety and holding my husband accountable although he is less judgmental on what to do about it. I think he is letting me work it out with his help. Good luck and stick with it...you are so young and I applaud you for dealing with this problem instead of hoping it to go away like I did
25 years ago.