I don't know how...wish I could help you. I think the cold, hard truth that may help you protect yourself the most is that you feel the need to protect yourself from the one who isn't supposed to hurt you. You should never have to feel this way, so the fact that you do is an indication that something needs to change...whether it is you that changes (you are in control of changing you) or him that changes (you cannot control him or make him change). Unfortunately, the only surefire way to protect yourself is to change you. I know this is hard - keep your chin up!!