The thing about addiction that we don't realize when it enters our lives is that it affects us, the non-addicted ones who love the A. Read around here, pick up some literature (I like Codependent No More by Melody Beattie) and try to understand that YOU have been harmed by his addiction also. It can be a very eye-opening experience to discover that you ARE suffering from an addiction (to your loved one) but that YOU have the power to change that (not his addiction, though, only he can tackle that one). I have found a WEALTH of experience reading on this website for the past several months. I hope you stick around and find some answers to your questions, and some calm for your fears!