Can I join the parent check-in group? I ranted the other day about my 24 year old son and wanted to tell all the folks who responded how much I value your advice, input and encouragement. And Grateful2b, I think that once the mourning period is over you do feel a certain peace. Perhaps it is just in letting go of the fight and surrendering. But I have a problem with maintaining that serenity! I try to stop my mind when it starts going down the codie path with my son, try to love the son underneath the addict like advised, and try to keep my head clear with what is enabling and what is just being a mom. It's so hard to fend off the anxiety sometimes. I sure could use a mantra for these moments!