Yup you are doing the best thing for both of you. One thing that I have found with my daughter is that conversation about her using, getting help, etc. is basically a lost cause. When I talk about it, it is more for my benefit than hers. She knows because she is living it. Same with him. He knows what he should do, he knows that he is hurting himself and you. Right now he is coming down and probably craving more and is not ready to hear the message. Taking care of you and letting him deal with his stuff is the right thing right now. Hugs, Marle