Emotional manipulation is insidious. Problem is, I didn't see that until I learnt more about it. I am well out of my relationship with an alcoholic, however I still have to deal with it in my daily life. My Mom is a classic example. And she doesn't even know she is doing it, I am sure. In fact, I almost certain that most manipulators are the same. They simply do what has worked for them in the past and continue to do it until it doesn't work any more on that particular person.
It's all crazy making stuff. I am glad I know about it now. I have side-stepped a number of potential "friendships" by seeing the signs.