Guilt and Shame are the trademarks of people who are ACOA.
You see, this guilt that we take on is not really ours. It's the alcoholics.
You're father won't speak to you because now that you're on to him, he can't lie to you!
Don't allow yourself to heap mountains of guilt and shame upon yourself for trying to get help.
Alanon can save your life. It will show you how to deal with situations just like yours. You will learn how to rid yourself of the guilt and shame and how to stand up for yourself and not be taken advantage of, all the while being a loving and caring daughter.
You don't even have to say anything at all. You can just sit and listen. You can talk to someone after the meeting if you want. They are all there to help you. Isn't that wonderful? A whole room full of people waiting to help you.
Go ahead and go. It will be worth it.