You can't police someone no matter how hard you try. I remember thinking and asking, "How will I know, how will I know?" Everyone in my meetings and on here said, "You'll know." They were right.
In my opinion, drug testing would show that I haven't come to admit I am powerless over his/her actions. And that I still have to be in THEIR business, trying to figure out what THEY are doing.
The way I've found some peace in my life is by getting the focus back on me and letting the addict figure out what it is they want for their life. And like Big Sis said, in the meantime I decide if I want to live with someone who has broken my trust, stolen, cheated, etc.
And let me add something funny here regarding how nuts a person can get with all this. I have a friend in my Al Anon group who said she was so into drug testing her son that she and her husband looked into buying the drug tests by the CASE so they could save money. :rof: If you asked her if any of those drug tests did a bit of good, she'd tell you she would have been wiser to spend that money on teaching dogs how to talk!
