Originally Posted by
Sonny McB 
Jail is not a good idea at all. You need to find a realistic way of reaching him. Or he needs to find a way to mature on his own.
From my experience.. Jail just makes people worse. It's not a good system. It doesnt help or rehabilitate people. Jail teaches people to hate. I have old friends who can't seem to stay out and it just makes them worse. I have had to cut ties with these people.
Welcome to SR Sonny,
One thing you will learn in recovery is taking responsibility for your actions.
You Steal = You go to Jail
Not
You Steal = Mom needs to find a way of reaching her drug addicted son
If it worked that way Sober Recovery would not exist.
Every Mom on here has tried that route before they found SR.
Some jails are bad, yes, some are good, some save lives. That is not for us to us to decide. We make a choice when we steal or break the law that we may end up in jail. If jail was "That Bad" then your friends would probably make the choice to not go back in there again. Usually it's drugs that draw people back in there again. Nevertheless it's not Barbdee's responsibility to make "her son not steal" from her.
She could be saving her son's live in the long run. He continues to steal from someone else the consequences could be deadly.
Why is he stealing from you in the first place?
Because that is what drug addicts do. Where else would he get his money for drugs. It does not matter how much money you have, You ALWAYS NEED MORE.
He doesn't have money? You're allowing him to stay under your roof without working and contributing?
You need to be respected in order to reach him. You cannot gain respect by giving him a free ride.
Another thing I've learned in recovery is to ask and not tell people what they "NEED" to do. I can offer suggestions and find out their story, but assuming is a bit judgmental, and telling people what they need to do doesn't really work.
This was not about Barbdee needing respect from her son. You are kind of disrespecting her by your assumptions of how she is handling her son and not knowing what she has already been through and is going through with him. If you knew her story She DOES deserve respect from him. Period Amen. ~Peace~ 