I can't help with other peoples behavior as I only have the control of the behavior and actions of one person.
I have said in the past that I would recommend A.A. to anyone whether they have ever drank or not. Only reason being is that it is a spiritual based 12 step program that helps us to see which things in life we can call our own and what we can't.
Control over the behavior and actions of others are one of the things that don't belong to us. We can die trying to achieve this or we can learn the fine art of Acceptance.
I don't think A.A. is the answer in your case, but there are other programs that implement the same 12 steps. They've stood the test of time.
The last thing I want to incinuate is that this is "Your Problem" but I think you will find that "The Problem" becomes much easier to deal with when we learn that God is in charge and we aren't.
I went from groveling at my wifes feet when she threatened divorce(every day) to singing "Ding Dong the Witch is Dead" .
She hasn't changed much, but our lives together has tremendousley. We're happier tenfold. I attribute it to 12 simple steps.
I wouldn't recommend sing songs like that, or my favorite "Thank God and Greyhound she's gone" Until you test the waters first.
Here is a Chapter out of the Book I use. Read it and see if it helps or at least comes up with some answers for you.
http://www.aa.org/bigbookonline/en_t...edintime16.pdf