escaping
Hey, everybody,
I currently live with an alcoholic boyfriend. He is very abusive when he drinks but very nice when he does not. He has done horrible things to me and I when I try to escape, he steps up his attacks. Last time I tried to leave him, he showed up at my workplace drunk and belligerent, and I almost lost my medical residency.
After a long period of unemployment,he finally got a consulting job about 600 miles away. On weekends he would fly back to see me (although I secretly wished he would not). However, I could say no because he knows where I live and would come anyway... About three months after he started his consulting job, he lost it due to his drinking too much/showing up drunk. He then begged me to move back in with me because he was homeless. Well, I told him he could but he had to wait a couple weeks. In that time period, he we on a cocaine binge and disappeared for a week. He came back and after a couple of rough weeks where he was self-detoxinbg(dangerous, I know) he cut down on his drinking and is now only drinking 3-5 beers/day. However, in my heart of hearts, I know the only way for him to be sober, is to stop drinking altogether. He promises to do that, but never does...
Anyway, I decided that I need out of the relationship. I just need some feedback about when to get out. He is (hopefully) starting a job in late January in Austin, TX (I am in New Orleans, LA) but wants to try to make the long distance relationship thing work until we can move in together after a year. I would like to be nice to him until he starts this job and then when he leaves, send him a dear john letter -- however, he still knows where I live and work. Second option: I am finishing my residency this year and interviewing around the country for my first job this month. When he asks me where I matched/am moving to, I could lie and then basically disappear. This means I would have to put up with him till May, though.