Your sisters reaction was not at all unusual for an addict. My husband and I called the cops and had my daughter arrested after she robbed our house ( we had left her home to watch the cats and the house- even payed her for it- when we were on vacation). She still (over a year later) can't believe "my own parents called the cops" and seems incapable of understanding that robbing her parents home is not OK. ("I would have payed you back; you didn't have to call the police.") Then she was equally outraged that we threw her out when she couldn't stay clean, couldn't stop being verbally abusive, and couldn't stop lying and stealing. Somehow none of this was her fault. I can say that over time, she cooled down and now claims to love us rather than hate us - so there's that. I have no experience with the kid situation, though.