Hey Bob:
I don't have the kids situation either unless you count a psycho dog with massive separation anxiety probelms, a cat who just lost his brother and now thinks I am the surrogate and friends who all in the middle of some major crisis.....
and last year i had my own version of a child - called my addict....
Like Anns - I too had my own business running out of the house, my addict had his business as well - we worked constantly (when he was clean) and i can remember the fights we used to get into almost wanting to strangle one another at times....
Here are my thoughts....
1. yes - absolutely you are in the right place to vent and yes we all do think you are a god!!!
but things happen for a reason and I for one am glad that we can be here for you....
2. ASK FOR MORE HELP WHERE YOU CAN...... on these boards - tell us what help you need.... I for one would be mroe than happy to try to take on more responsibility... Are you the only one that runs the DJ business? If youhave help - maybe you can start straining someone to come in and help you with some of the day to day tasks... remember - addicts, alocholics and alnoners are MASSIVE contorl freaks - even when we think we are not.... take a moment and look at your attitudes - do you find yourself saying - well it would take too long to teach someone, it is faster to do it myself??? if so - I am going to have to smack you with the skillet to dislodge that thinking - that is classic controling behavior....
3. Calmly rationally tell your wife that you can not fix behaviors if she is not honet with you about her feelings.... Most people are deathly afraid of approachuing the subject because all it turns into is a big verbal slug fest.... I am a HUGE fan of Dr. Phil from Oprah and he has some very valueable advice when it comes to relationships.... in EVERY REALATIONSHIP it boils down to a battle over control. it boils down to a person's self esteem... the kids probably just wnat some more of your attention - not you multi taksing..... your wife proably want ssome more of your attention - not your mutli tasking.. and i would exepct want the same from your family.....
take it from those that know - WORK WILL WAIT!!! THIS BOARD WILL WAIT!! hell - we are all just trying to figure out the pictures
What are your priorities? reamining clean and your family correct? are your actions matching your desired prioritites?
Here is a question that Dr. Phil asks all the the time:
What can YOU do today to improve your relationship?
Don't say - well i want my wife or my kids to do this.... start making changes on your own to improve the situation and i will bet you a pair of bunny slippers that you will start to see improvement in your wife and kids....
does that make any sense?
Love
Ogly