Awh, it is sad, he has you right where he wants you. Addicts are smart people, they are skilled liars, great manipulators and they know what people in their life want to hear. Without drugs, imagine what addicts could accomplish.
The only thing that is your fault is allowing yourself to be controlled by him. Do not allow yourself to believe you have any control over him. You cannot control whether he gets high or goodness forbid, should he die. Hopefully you really do not believe you could save him from death? Drugs control him.
Have you read the adult children of alcoholics? I found a couple of posts that were helpful. One post mentioned the cycle of children of addicted parents finding mates with addiction problems. Another post mentioned children of alcoholic parents usually either take responsibility for nothing or they take responsibility for everything. If that is true, we may fall into the take responsibility for everything category.
You do have the strength to walk away, change your number, move if need be. His life will go on, you do not want to continue with him thru the cycle. Take time and focus on why you are really attracted to this man and how you can make sure that your are not attracted to his type in the future.
My sister is a drug addict, when clean she loves her family and would do anything for us. When on heroin, HEROIN is her first and only love. There is nothing left for anyone else. I have been thru the cycle many times, from experience a clean rehabilitating addict is sorry for the pain they have caused. A using addict blames you for causing them to want to get high.
Be strong...
Sending warm thoughts your way...
XOXOX