Welcome to SR Shiloh!!
I totally understand about the codie thing - I finally realized that I had my relapse 8 months ago because I was stressed out about a situation I had no control over and I forgot to keep my recovery as my priority.
This forum is GREAT, but you may want to check out the Friends and Families forums too (if you haven't already) - I mainly go on the one for substance abuse, but you may want to check out the one for alcoholics. Not only is it helping me learn how NOT to be a codie, my insight (as an addict) helps those who are struggling with why an addict does what we do.
It's just a thought - no matter what forum you post on at SR, you will find tons of support
Hugs and prayers!
Amy