Hello sidmom, I have been away from the boards for a while. Yes, it is possible for your A to recover. I just completed ny first month in Al-Anon and my husband is into his second month of sobriety in AA. Jesus, the stories I've heard in Al-Anon. And teh success stories my husband has heard in AA - guys on Skid Row who have been bums for 20 years getting religion and turning their life around. However - you cannot - must not - think about this! Everything now is about you. He will do what he will do. You must save yourself and learn from your pain because you still have a long road ahead of you. I don't necessarily subscribe to the idea that co-dependents are ill or in some way not well. I think we are would-be healthy people with poor coping skills facing horrendously powerful and stressful life experiences. We do what we can do when we can do it. However, this does not mean we want to continue running our very unproductive patterns forever. Go to Al-Anon. You'll meet with people who, believe me, can knock your stories right out of the ballpark. If they've been there any length of time chances are good that they are also happy, energized and working towards peace. You will get a vision of where you can be six months or a year from now. Just be hopeful, keep your heart open and refuse to be cynical! Love, Chi