Odaat you should be so proud of yourself for your 10 months.
My emotions tend to bounce around alot also, so I can identify with you.
You say..."now that I'm trying to actually recover" Take out three word and BAM you turned a corner...
Try this..."now that I am recovering" You see, how you view this journey can have a huge impact on your recovery.
I am sorry you are feeling anxious and this forum is a great place to take your worries. Keep your eye on the prize....anything that is good in this world comes with hard work, patience and faith.