Ray, I was able to forgive my X a lot faster than I was able to forgive myself for putting up with it so long. Unfortunately, it was my natural tendency to forgive him that kept me sick for so long. I would love and forgive, and love and forgive, and love and forgive while he just kept going deeper into the pit. I don't even like to talk to him on the phone because I still don't trust myself not to love and forgive one more time.
I really, really hope it works out for you....and him. There are success stories out there....look at Dakota! This could be his time.
You will know soon enough, Ray. You are so strong and so smart. If he can't live up to his expectations, you know that you can make it on your own. When you don't "need" someone, it is a lot easier to make rational decisions about them.
You will be fine, one way or another.
((Hugs))
Babs