Taken from
http://www.bma-wellness.com/papers/W...very_Hard.html
The addict's subjective mental state consists of an obsession and preoccupation with his addiction that has been likened by many observers to the state of being in love. It is this peculiar obsessive mental state that leads to the obvious and external behaviors that are commonly identified as addiction. But the real origin of addiction lies in the mind, and in the thinking, dwelling, planning and anticipating the addict engages in regard to his specific addiction(s).
Like an ordinary lover, the addict is obsessed with the object of his love, misses it when separated from it, exaggerates its positive qualities and minimizes or ignores its negative qualities. It becomes the center around which his life revolves and the goal toward which he is constantly striving. Obstacles between the addict and his addiction only increase his desire and devotion – for "absence makes the heart grow fonder." And efforts by third parties to separate the addict from his beloved addiction invariably lead to renewed efforts by the addict to become reunited with what has become the most important thing in his life.
And also like the everyday lover, the love of the addict for his addiction does not always run smoothly nor lead to the blissful happiness that once seemed to be promised. In fact, the course of an addictive illness can closely resemble that of an unhappy, unhealthy love affair of the well known type in which the lover can neither live with nor without the beloved. There are repeated honeymoons, turbulent sequels, recurring breakups followed by grief and then by ecstatic reunion – and the whole cycle begins over again and repeats itself. Not without reason have some forms of love and infatuation been compared to an addictive process from which the lover is either unable or unwilling to free himself, and for which he appears almost insanely willing to suffer tribulations and pains – including at times, death itself.