Hi Morning Glory,
Good to hear from you. I too have had a hectic week at work. I hope your weekend is more restful and we can both refresh ourselves.
You know the duck thing has really helped me as I am learning to deal with alcoholism. Yesterday was my husband's birthday and I planned to take him out to dinner with the kids. I told him this, but when I got home he was not there. The kids were home because I told them to be sure to be home for his birthday. So we waited for about an hour for him to come home. We were all hungry. So I left him a note saying meet us at the resturant. As we were leaving he rode up on his motorcycle. I asked him why he was late and we were leaving for the resturant. He had been drinking and he was nasty and saying how he didn't want to get any **** from me etc. And I said then maybe you should stay home(very calm). And the kids and I went to dinner. As we were driving away I thought Quack, Quack, this is just the alcohol speaking. And I forgot about it. No analysing why he said those things and whether I was at fault. Just quack quack. The kids and I had a fun dinner. Then when we got home I was in a fine mood and we had cake and opened presants and cards and it was fine. Later he came to sit with me as I watched TV and said he was sorry about all the trouble we were having lately. And you know what? I told myself quack quack and didnt even get drawn into the conversation. Usually with this kind of opening I would have launched into a big analysis. No big analysis about our relationship - I didn't ignor him, but just didnt over respond to his words.
Sorry about the long story. It helps me to write it all out. I guess this is detachment. I felt good about it and the ducks and quacking really helped. thanks