[QUOTE=keepingmyjoy;1466296] I feel like I am just sitting around waiting for the other shoe to drop! QUOTE]
Ugh been there done that and still doing it. Not a great place to be stuck in. My AH figures as long as he's not drunk and out of control he's covering the bases. Thing is, it never works for him. Without a good recovery program and the support from AA it will never work imo.
So pretty much that's how it's been for me whenever AH has tried to quit or "cuts back because he thinks he's out of control" He did white knuckle it for about 4 mos before but his friends and family missed the life of the party and started calling non-stop wondering what he was up to. He started lying and sneaking around about drinking again, and that went on for awhile, until he finally just started walking in the house with a case of beer again. He never said a word about it and neither did I. What can I say?
I've tried boundaries, we've had the AA talk etc etc I had even offered to go with him for the first time or two. The disease can't respect my boundaries and slaps me down every time. The ball always lands back in my court.. I'm at the point I stopped trying making boundaries between us or discussing how his drinking affects me. He already knows, and he knows its been destroying us.
Until he decides he wants sobriety and recovery in his life there's really no point in me giving that much attention to the relationship anymore. Maybe I'm wrong, but until I can enforce my boundaries there is no point throwing them out there.