Big Sis says it very well. You do what you can live with for today. Start with small boundaries you know you can stick to. Don't outkick your coverage. Don't set boundaries you know you can't possibly enforce. This was a huge mistake for me with my AS. Id say if you do this then, well the then never came and i was as big a liar as he was, and he knew I wouldn' stick to what id said. I try, notice I said try not to do that anymore.