Bonbon, I dont have any better advice, but I know how you feel. There is a prayer I like: God help me hang on until my change comes. I like this prayer because it suggests that the change is coming, things are shifting, we may not see it yet, but things are happening. Hang on, your change is coming. God and the universe is working to help you, give them some time. I will be praying for you today. ((((Bonbon)))