Sending hugs your way. It's an impossible situation being the pill or booze keeper. It doesn't work at all.
It just drags you down because the A cannot just cut down for a time without going back to the usual more. Such is the nature of the hateful beast addiction.
Fair? No way. Never.
I am not a believer in "everything happens for a reason." The concept is incomprehensible to me. Living life on life's terms resonates with me as that is what each person faces. When the terms are too harmful, stressful, crazy making, overwhelming finding a way out is smart and necessary survival. Whether it be detachment or leaving, you Wendy
will know when you've had enough. And do not beat yourself up over it...we all do
what we do when we are ready and not one second before.
It's okay to feel angry and vent it all out. I never met a codie that wasn't angry/sad/ fed up especially living in the constant chaos, the hell of addiction.