Bad week-end with son...
My son came home on pass from rehab for the day, and it wasn't the greatest day. He was very quiet towards me, although kind. He spent the day with friends on and off, two girls that were arrested the same week-end he was. They also had drugs to sell. He kept trying to get me to talk about whether he would go to the recovery house after rehab or come home. He is so clueless. Where did he get this idea that it was his choice? On the way home in the car we got into an argument about this whole thing. It's so frustrating as a parent to hear your child make such assinine statements as "I'll get the charges dropped, you can't make me go, i'd rather go to jail, blah, blah, blah." Anyway,it ended badly and after I left him at rehab, I felt relief and then guilt.
His counselor will talk to him today about his decision to send AS to recovery house, so we will see. He will be so mad. How can he be so blind to what he has done? HOw can he remember only the positive things and gloss over the negative? Where is his reality? I have a feeling that reality is going to hit ihim hard and then he will come whining to me.
I am tired of his chaos, tired of his denial, tired of the wholething. I think I will go for a walk now, even though it's supposed to get up to 98 today. I have to keep moving or I will crumble.
krhea