If you decide to go the school route, you probably qualify for all kinds of financial aid if your job is low paying. And more and more schools have apartment-style housing for students with families, of which you could roll the cost into your financial aid package, or you could probably find something near the school of your choice and get housing assitance. Don't know how it works, but I know it's out there. Also, don't be afraid to apply for other types of assitance if you need it... food stamps, etc... esp if you have low income and children to feed, you should be able to get a decent amount of help.
Do you have a friend that you and your children could go to on a temporary basis? What about, as others have said, the idea of moving towards your family? If they are too far away to help now, then maybe they are far enough away to keep ah from you? Especially if your job is pretty low-paying... do you think you could find another job near your family? I guess IMHO the ideal would be if you could go to school near your family... get the best of both worlds?
As far as meetings go... I would still find meetings to go to, as often as possible...
I generally love the idea of saving money, BUT if you are that afraid of your ah, even just afraid of him if you leave, what happens if you do something else to "set him off" in the meantime, while trying to save up the money? God forbid you never get a chance to use it... Just from your tone in these posts, I really feel a sense of urgency to leave.
We're all a little afraid of change... but it sounds like things are about to change either way, for the better or to get worse... if it were me, I'd want to make sure I was trying to make it go in my favor.
I'm praying for you today
*hugs and prayers*