hello-kitty

Well, my ex(?) got out of prison last week. I was surprised. He has 1 year of community corrections left to go and apparently, they told him to check in in 2 weeks. That's it. That's all. He's free. No mandatory treatment, meetings, nothing. I think that is really sad. However, he is clean. He is working. He cleaned the house this weekend and he paid me some rent. He is about as emotionally mature as our 2 year son. A couple times he lashed out at me, verbally, but other than things are ok. I miss being alone and raising my son by myself but I really need the $$$ and I appreciate the help with our son. Being a single parent is hard (as you all know). I’m not attracted to him anymore but he wants a physical relationship. And he is pretty immature about it. It’s driving me nuts.

He hasn’t relapsed yet. I guess I am waiting for that to happen. Who knows… maybe he won’t. I have a really hard time believing that though. I just can’t let the past go. I just don’t feel “it” anymore. Yet, I feel strangely responsible for him. I am the only person he knows on the outside that isn’t a complete drug using idiot. I know that is not my responsibility but it’s hard to deal with the guilt if I was to withhold my hospitality from him. Not sure where I go from here.

PS. Ray, I just wanted to let you know that my ex was attending church while he was in prison too. And meetings. But he no longer wants to. That makes it even harder on me since I have started attending regularly and church is a big part of my life.