If u feel that talking to him and explaining yourself and your wants will help change things or help him to realize what u would like him to do than go ahead. You have been with this person for a long time I can understand why its so hard to walk away. If you want to make it work and help him work on things then go ahead. At least if things dont work out u cant say u didnt try. If u read around some of the other forums even after the addict is clean they change sometimes they never go back to being the same person.
Take for instance my dad he was/is an alcoholic he used to be funny, laughed, seemed to enjoy things more. Now that he is sober he is a serious, demanding, one sided, opinionated person. Maybe he was all along and that side just didnt show itself very often. Just remember no one can make a person change as its been said around here b4 if love could get them clean non of us would be here. Also like its been said b4 he came clean off pills and is still on the sub, then switched to the coke, IMHO from taking pills they give u some energy, pep u up, make u feel good. Then on the sub the pills cant do that anymore so he switched to the coke to give him that pep, that feel good feeling. What if he finds something else to do that to him? Looks like hes trying to escape something trying to change the way he feels. I would just hate in a few yrs or months for u to go through this yet with a different drug. Something to think about, maybe.
U have to do what u can live with, u have to do what is best for u and your children I think alot of parents think keeping the marriage together for the children is the best thing for them. I tend to disagree if its an unhappy marriage I dont think children should have to watch their parents fight all the time and be miserable because they think its best. Was the marriage good b4 the drugs? Will u be able to let go of the past and move on to the future? Will u be able to ever trust him again? If I personally answered "NO" to any of these ?'s I would have to question my future with this person and if this person is who I want to be with. If u dont think u can let go of the past what does the future hold, I hope not playing detective, questioning him, being his babysitter.