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Old 07-14-2007, 05:19 PM
  # 367 (permalink)  
raerae6
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Join Date: May 2007
Location: here and now
Posts: 1,291
Live, I can understand your hurt and frustration.

before I was with the addict, I had a bf for a few years who had a bad case of clinical depression. He would talk about suicide sometimes. Gradually our sex life became nil. Being depressed decreased his sex drive and when he would take his meds (which he would never stay on for vary long) he had no drive either. I felt completely rejected. When we did try, he couldn't really function right. I am still good friends with him to this day-platonic friends.

I think he felt bad about it, but towards the end he would look at porn on the internet every day (which normally I wouldn't mind if we had a sex life) but then he would not even look at me if I was walking naked around the house. I never did really figure that out.

In a lot of ways being with him was similar to the addict-they each had a problem that they would not really deal with. They both would refuse to really follow through with the prescribed treatment plan. In both cases I spent so much time looking for answers to the problem and lost myself in the process.

It is so frustrating when a man will choose not to communicate. It is so typical, though.

A few months after I split up with the depressed bf, I started going out and about more and started to realize that I was still attractive after all!

I just picked the wrong guy-an addict.

I do have one friend who I did 'get busy' with a while ago, but it was a dissappointing experience for me because we are just not very compatible in bed.

I imagine your man feels kind of bad about what is going on...Do you feel that he could perform if he wanted to? Or do you feel like he just isn't trying? He probably feels bad, too. It is a real ego buster to a man if they cannot perform, if that is the problem.
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