Hi STefanie! I am a little late on this but I wanted to say I hope that you get your cancer under control and eventually gone completely. Cancer treatment has come a long way inthe past few years so there is lots of hope for you to get better.
I am sorry about your son, but right now you need to let him go and concentrate on yourself. The mind/body connection is very powerful and what you are thinking can influence your physical state. If you don't meditate already, I highly recommend that you learn to do so byt starting slowly, just 5 minutes at a time, focusing on your breath and nothing else. Then when you get where you can calm your mind you can focus it on getting that cancer out of your body. Visualization really helps a sick person get better, just ask the workers at your cancer treatment facility.
(((HUGS)))